Monday, January 25, 2010

Oops I Forgot...

The human brain is very complex. Most information that is transmitted via our five (some claim to have six) senses would find a suitable place that will remain in our brain forever. However, most of us have not the skill to manage it properly. As such, this information gets lost in our brain. That’s when one would normally say, “I have forgotten about that”.

When I was in secondary school, I recall (by accident, and not because I have manage to master the skill of brain management) what my teacher told my class. The Arabic term for human is “insan”. “Insan” is derived from the word “nisyan” which literally means “forgetfulness”. Humans are forgetful. It is a blessing that we usually forget. If we can remember everything, life would not be pleasant as life is filled with its ups and downs.

There are things that we do not want to remember and there are things which we want to never forget. It happens naturally. You don’t need to be hit by a blunt object to forget. Many a times as I pray, I would remember to do a million and one things but the moment I complete my prayer, I can’t even remember one task that I remembered earlier. Actually, that revolves around not being focused or “khusyu’” during prayers. Sorry, wrong example. But I think you get my drift.

There are also things which we should remember but we forget all about it. Sometimes, we realize it too late. Hence we get reminders to remind us about what not to forget. As the saying goes, a man need not remember all of his mistakes. He has his wife to remind him about it. *chuckle*

One of the much wisdom that lies behind Islam is how it teaches mankind to remember via repetition. We are asked to remind ourselves of the many wonders of God, remember His Blessings and reminded seek for it at all times. Hence the term "Dzikir" which means remembrance of Allah.

As humans, we also have loads of duties and responsibilities. This is especially so when we have been appointed as the vicegerents of Allah on this earth. As we grow older, we are given more responsibilities. So much so that we sometime forget to fulfill all of it as we are too focused with some other task.

Looking at relationship per se, one of my senior in service reminded me to be a good father but to never stop being the best husband. Whilst it is important to be the fatherly figure that my daughter would need, I must never cease to be my wife’s companion, best friend, soul mate and most importantly, her lover. I asked her naively, could a husband forget that he is his wife’s lover? She smiled and said, “Most failures in marriages are because of that (or vice verca)…”

I pray that I would never forget about this and that the Bride would be my reminder in case I do forget. Just as how I would be reminding her if the ball rolls the other way round.

But out of curiosity, how do you remind your partner in case if they forget?

Beats me.

But I do know it will require a hell of a lot of wisdom as you can't just go and tell them in-your-face.

Suggestions any one?

Blog adjourned.

1 obiter dictum:

Nikeda said...

i suppose u cant really force someone to remember something that they forgot but what you can do is constantly letting them know that you havent forgotten. eg: if a wife forgot that SHE is HER HUSBAND'S lover, remind her that YOU are HER lover, instead. so much easier to do! and in time, she'll remember again. win-win